Girls, what is going on? I have been hearing some very un-GEMS-like issues occurring from supposed GEMS girls. I am just curious as to why this is happening? Here’s my advice to all of my victims out there: find the friend/friends who is going to stick by you. This may NOT be your current group of friends. In fact, if you’re having some issues, it’s likely that the current group of girls you are hanging around with is not considered a group of “friends.”

Let’s review. A friend is a person who accepts you for who you are. They may not always agree with every decision you make, but you can talk out these disaggreements. A friend will NEVER say or do anything to intentionally exclude you, make fun of you, or hurt you. If any person is making you feel bad about yourself or like you don’t have a right to belong to something, then you need to make some changes.

1.) If you feel comfortable, you may approach the person individually (one-on-one) and try to find out what the problem is by discussing how you feel when they say or do the mean thing that they are doing.
This is not an opportunity for you start yelling or accusing this person. If you feel you cannot approach this person in a calm manner (or vice versa), then this is not an option.
2.) Confide in a friend who is NOT involved in the problem. Ask them for advice or simply support. For example maybe this person can be the person you sit with at lunch now or partner up with in phys. ed. class.
3.) If this situation is interfering with your day-to-day activities, like participating in class, changing for phys. ed., playing a sport, or eating lunch in the cafeteria, then you need to go to a trusted adult.

Finally, as hard as it sometimes is to realize, sometimes that person who we so desperately want to be friends with is just not worth it! I encourage to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I’m an amazing person who deserves amazing friends who love me for who I am.” Seriously girls, maybe this month is the time for you to “march” on past those so-called “friends” and find the person or group of people who lift you up, support you, stand by you, and allow you to be yourself.